STEP ONE
RETURN TO YOUR FIRST LOVE
One of the first things I think you need to consider is why you want to be in a HC? Why did you leave the last church you were part of? Many when they first leave an Institutional Church setting have many issues to deal with. One of the most important is they have spent a lot of time with their attention on programs rather than relationships. Often they have left their first love, Jesus, to be involved with programs. It is so easy to be busy in meetings and programs. To be more concerned with if the carpets are cleaned in the Church building, then if your heart is clean before the Lord.
We spent so many Sundays showing up for meetings in our Sunday best with our Sunday smiles on. We told everyone the same lie week after week, that every thing is going great, that the Lord is wonderful to me. No matter how bad we felt, we just didn't want to be honest and risk the looks and comments we would get if we told people the truth.
What you are looking to be involved in is harder than anything you may have ever been involved with in your whole Christian life. It will involve sacrifices you have never had to make before. It will be the hardest thing you have ever done, and the most rewarding. There will be those who will question your sincerity, will think you are in serious rebellion to the Lord, will accuse you and warn you of becoming a cult. Some may shun you in hopes of bringing you back to the correct walk in the Lord. Some will shun you afraid to be drug into the rebellion you are walking in. Some will come to you just as hurt and confused as you are now.
You may be going through a process many call a "wilderness" experience. You think that you may have lost your relationship with God. You miss the feelings of God's presence you felt in the Worship Services. The truth is you may have well left your first love because of those "Worship Services" replacing time alone with Him for singing and other activities.
If you are going through a dry time of the soul, a wilderness experience, you may not be ready for relationships with other believers. Spend this time seeking Him who first called you, decide that nothing else matters but Him and knowing Him. Think on Him, pray without ceasing. As you get humble before Him, really humble without all the religious fanfare, you will find Him, you will sense His presence once again. The light of His relationship with you will shine forth bright as the sun once again. I know, I've been down that road, I had been lost in the darkness of my own wilderness.
Jesus said to the Church in Revelations 2:4, 5 "But I hold against you that you have given up your first love. Therefore, call to mind from what you have fallen, and repent and practice what you did previously; or else if you do not repent, I shall come to you and remove the lampstand from it's place."
And Revelations 3:20 "Behold I stand at the door and knock. If anyone listens to My voice and opens the door, I shall come in to him and dine with him and he with Me." (both from the New
The first step is to return to your First Love, Jesus, who loved you first and called you out of darkness and translated you into His kingdom of light.
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